The armour is off...

I feel it's time to turn my fear into fire without burning it all down.

For the last few weeks my energy has been a bit out of sorts. On Friday morning I didn’t rush to hit leg day or smash my goals I had written at the beginning of the week. I returned to bed coffee in hand, book and journal. There was a time when returning to bed to enjoy my morning coffee would have tasted like guilt. I would have been hard on myself, feeling like I had failed myself. But instead I listened to my body, I had an intentional slow morning. I trust fully in the message my body brings and clearly I needed to rest.

But, this morning Monday felt different.

I woke at 6am, stepping into the stillness of the darkness yet somehow within I felt lighter, different. Instead of the pressure to rush or perform, there was this feeling of wowness. I allowed myself to feel into it, hold it, anchor it. Something in my body felt unmistakably different.

I stepped outside, grounded, and welcomed the cold wet morning, feeling all of it. Unsure what but I had this overwhelming feeling of love. Gratitude.

Are you feeling this too?

Could it finally be that…

The shedding is complete?

We are standing right on the edge of the Lunar New Year. Tomorrow, Feb 17th, we move into the year of the Fire Horse.

Many of us would have felt like we crawled through 2025 and the last few weeks. For me, the “9 Year” in Chinese astrology has been a descent. Everything I thought I had faced, worked on, healed, well it came back full throttle.

Why?

Because the rejection wound, the abandoned child, the armour I’ve worn for over four decades to survive… all of it has been slowly, relentlessly removed.

I spent years in fight‑flight, and the last twenty pre 2020 in functional freeze. My nervous system was so dysregulated that pulling back became my default. Every time I was ready to move forward, I would unconsciously retreat. It was so bloody frustrating. So why did was I still holding myself back? Keeping safe?

Yes, I held the credentials, the lived experience, the intuitive depth, but I was still dimming my own light to stay safe. I carried everything alone. I became the perfectionist, the people pleaser. I burned out twice in my 30s which almost saw me admitted to a mental health unit, but instead with 3 young children at home then I spent 5 years on antidepressants trying to “fix” myself. Little did I know it would be a further decade before I would face all parts of myself. I put everyone else’s oxygen mask on before my own, even while suffocating. Sound familiar?

The last year showed me exactly where I was still hiding. It forced me to face my own truth.

The snake is finally shedding. Those old identities are going with it. It’s time to step into the fire with self trust and belief, and own who I AM.

Triple Fire

I love astrology, numerology, human design, tarot, all of it. I love depth. I love looking at my clients’ charts. I’m absolutely not an astrologer, but I’m a lifelong learner.

Looking at my own chart, I see I was born a triple fire;

Leo Sun. Aries Moon. Sagittarius Rising.

People assume that means I’m full of fire, energy, and take up space.

Far from my truth. Because my childhood trauma doesn’t care about placements right?!

When you grow up being told you’re “too much,” “unwanted,” and you navigate the care system where survival literally depends on being useful or invisible, that fire doesn’t burn bright. It turns inward. It becomes pain, anger, rage, shame.

I carried those emotions in my body for decades. They showed up in my marriage, friendships, parenting. I had no self‑love, no boundaries, no safety.

Today I feel amazing within. I feel safe. I have been to the depths. But still I was playing small. 2025 reminded me exactly of what was happening, what I needed to see within and externally.

That little girl inside me right now, she’s with me always. She was never too much. Never not enough. She is my everything.

Today, going forward, I’m bringing all of her into the light, into the Fire Horse energy.

This isn’t about galloping.

It’s about moving forward with ease. Trust. Belief.

Astrology

There is a lot happening astrologically, so many astrologers sharing their thughts. We see a lot of what is happening playing out in the world before our very eyes. This does concern me. The re-traumatisation this has brought for many. Fear, anger, rage, disgust. With Saturn and Neptune going conjunct on the 20th, we’re being called home to ourselves. We must trust our inner voice. There will continue to be periods of heightened fear. I feel it’s deliberate. There will be a lot of noise. Masks will fall and the truths will unfold.

We will begin to see this in many areas. I already see this in my own space, especially with the rise of AI. It is going to get even noisier, none of us know how this will play out but we need to TRUST in ourselves. Our truth. Our intuition.

I absolutely know why I am here on this earth. I know why my soul returned.

What part do you want to play in the healing of our planet?

Dreaming isn’t enough.

Your soul came here for a reason at this time. Please remember that.

When your mind goes into overdrive, when the noise gets loud, recognise it. Come home to yourself. Those who abuse power want you to feel helpless. Think back to 2020 and what we know now.

With Saturn at 13° Cancer in my 7th house and Neptune at 6° Sagittarius in my 12th, this is the year I anchor deeply into who I AM.

So, as everyone talks and shares their thoughts excitedly of the Fire Horse energy, we must remember, fire must be used intentionally. What we don’t burn up, we will burn down!

I’m definitely not running blindly.

I’m walking into this year with my armour off, choosing freedom and depth over performance and hustle.

I feel the fear. It’s real. It’s visceral.

But I’m turning my fear into the fuel I need to own who I AM and why I’m here in this lifetime.

This last year has simply been a REMEMBERING.

I finally feel home.